The breeze rucked my dress up around me, threatening a Marilyn moment, but for the first time in my life, I could have cared less. The vast expanse fell endless, breathless like if I closed my eyes, it would carry me away. I leaned over the rail watching the whale leap in and out of the Atlantic, which stretched out as far as the eye could see. "My mom always has it." I had no response to that. We had never been on that kind of boat together. He didn't take Dramamine because I didn't have any, I don't get seasick, and I didn't know he was prone to seasickness. Jeanna Kadlec: Kyle was seasick on the whale-watching tour during our honeymoon. Just a note to listeners, this conversation touches on suicide. Ngofeen Mputubwele: Jeanna Kadlec's memoir is called Heretic. It happened in public sometimes, but my parents were never brought in for these conversations, were never informed that they'd happened. I definitely had early experiences of it starting in sixth grade was the first time I started getting pulled aside by church ladies for purportedly dressing inappropriately, which the thing is I could never cover up to anyone's satisfaction. You are one of Eve's daughters like, "Do not tempt your brothers to sin." I couldn't tell you the first times I heard those. Ngofeen Mputubwele: The signs that Jeanna rubbed up against the stories she was raised in came really early. My mom, she made sure that we were surrounded by it. Jeanna Kadlec: To me, it really goes back to being in my mom's red station wagon, on the gravel country road to church in rural Iowa, and listening to contemporary Christian music at the time, listening to children's worship tapes like that. Ngofeen Mputubwele: For Jeanna, some of the associations that come with evangelicalism are very, very warm. Jeanna Kadlec: I love the Es with which we both pulled that out of our bodies and did not need to think.
Jeanna Kadlec: Because you did that, I'm going to sing something to you in turn that you may also well know for you. It's more like, I want to sing something and then see if you can join in. Ngofeen Mputubwele: I don't if it's a benediction.
Jeanna Kadlec: Yes, a benediction of the last thing. Before we get started, I just want to sing something. When I went to interview her, our shared background came up very quickly. She and I aren't from the same place, I'm from Tennessee, and she's from the Midwest, but we grew up in the same corner of what we call the Capital C Church. I read a memoir this year by a woman named, Jeanna Kadlec.
I produce stories on this show about how we all use language and music and theology, and even law to order the world we live in.
Ngofeen Mputubwele: I'm Ngofeen Mputubwele.
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